Peace be upon you.

My Photo
A flawed novice observer.
View my complete profile

The crowd.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Marching Bands of Manhattan.

This song is by Death Cab For Cutie. It's the first track of the album 'Plans' and DAMN I'm so in love with the chorus, and eventually the whole album itself. I already put this song up at the Mixpod player.. which you can see at the top of the page. The song's kinda old.. but it never cease to amaze me :D


If I could open my arms
And span the length of the isle of Manhattan
I'd bring it to where you are
Making a lake of the East River and Hudson

And if I could open my mouth
Wide enough for a marching band to march out
They would make your name sing
And bend through alleys and bounce off all the buildings

I wish we could open our eyes
To see in all directions at the same time
Oh, what a beautiful view
If you were never aware of what was around you

And it is true what you say
That I live like a hermit in my own head
But when the sun shines again
I'll pull the curtains and blinds to let the light in

Sorrow drips into your heart through a pinhole
Just like a faucet that leaks and there is comfort in the sound
But while you debate half empty or half full
It slowly rises, your love is going to drown
(4 x)

Your love is going to drown (4 x)

Your love is going to..

Totally love the meaning behind this song. The chorus, especially, tells you that sorrow will, in time, make you oblivious to the world, and maybe even to love. And while you decide whether or not you want to take love in - to be in doubt - eventually the love will fade away.

Well, that's what I thought anyway :)

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Remember The RED BOOK?


Do you remember the book?

I don't know if you do.. but I do. You probably think, "why do you care about it NOW? It's over and gone."

Well.. a hunch, actually. A hunch that brought me to RoxyGirl's blog. Well, don't know if she still likes Roxy.. but that's just how I remember her. :) And the fact that she kept apologizing all the time for not updating her 'bloggie' is amusing actually.
And so I read her entire blog.. because a hunch told me to. All the way to her first post on June 7th, 2007. And in one of those posts.. I saw the red book being mentioned. I NEVER thought I'll see it THERE.. a sure sign that she did think of it.. even if it's just once.

Just once.

Remember how it all started? We're all 14. Young, crazy, restless.. and of course, happy beyond words. We were crazy mental kids then.

We sang almost every song written in the journal in the bus on the way to the unforgettable camp that year. Move Along. Come Clean. Remember how leeches freak the s--- out of Roxy? Me too. XD

It started with something I wrote in the book. A diary post. Then ParamoreGirl saw what I did.. then she wrote some stuff in there. Crazy s--- stuff. XD
The next thing we know, we're all writing in there.
And it came to me then.. that it's not my journal. It's OUR journal.

Then it become a diary of a group of teenagers. Rojak Gang diary. Didn't know who came out with that name, but I definitely remember why - we're multiracial. I don't know about you.. but I felt like I just found my second home. I felt complete. Content. Perfect.

We wrote every s--- that happened in our lives in there, good and bad. Our crushes. Our.. uh, misunderstandings. Our fun moments. Remember how at one point one of us would say, "can I take it home? 'Cause I wanna read it and update later"? I do.

Then on a particular day.. the red book 'broke into 10 pieces'. But we just write in it anyway.

When there's no more paper left on whatever's left of the journal, I bought a new one. Then some begin to think how pointless this journal thing is. I felt weird. But it didn't matter. Partly because I never asked you to write in it.. so you may write and stop writing when you please, and also because I need a journal for my mind's sake.

2007 came. We're divided. There's no need to talk about the year.. simply 'cause it's a blast, just like last year, NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENED. Even if you broke my heart, or the other way round. It doesn't matter.. 'cause even before the year ended, I knew 2008 won't be the same, and that it won't beat the fun we had in year '06 and '07.

It's when we're divided that I decided.. no one cared anymore. I abandoned the Red Journal at the desk.. and didn't bother to pick it up ever since. Up till the end of the year. It's probably incinerated by now.. just like the way it burned away with time.

2008 came. We're growing up.. on diff paces. This growing up process brought us to a number of clashes. Call me cheesy if you wish, but seeing the same people that laughed at AND with each other some time before that.. suddenly going on each other's throats (that's just me being radical, it's really just cold wars and stuff but well, the effects are worse than cold wars, it seemed) is really heart breaking.

Then everything just changed. It's no longer a dream, for now I'm awake to see the reality. It doesn't matter. 'Cause everything comes and goes. The same way my father stayed in my life from day one onwards - March 15th, 1992.. till June 2nd, 2010.

[y]Our smiles are compiled into an collage of pictures in my head I never get bored of looking.
[y]Our laughs are among the best alarm clocks I ever had.. 'cause then, everytime I woke up, I know I'll be seeing you guys and then we'll go kerrrazy.. till 1.50pm, baby. Or 12.30pm on Friday.

Whatever happened that caused this to fade, it doesn't matter, and never will. All that mattered, is that I think of you from time to time, and wish you have everything you wished for.

Above all... I miss you. Take care.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Talk about regrets. Ugh!

To tell the truth, I'm bummed like crazy when it came to me that I never went to that paramore concert. I mean, how many friggin' times in one's lifetime that ANY band would ever perform at Malaysia.. again?

It's once-in-a-lifetime thing. And (probably, as always) I chose to blew it, wtf =="

I did the same thing to the MCR concert, s***.

Paramore is really awesome when it comes to jamming onstage. WHY? Well, go to YouTube and type Final Riot.. ESPECIALLY 'Let The Flames Begin' and 'We Are Broken'. These two are crazy amazing. And I missed THE concert I was dying to go. *bangs head to the keyboard*

Can't help feeling my youth's so wasted. God.. =="

Anyway, it got me thinking - WHAT IF.. I repeat the same stuff again and again if, God willing, I get to college? As if by reflex.. my brain and my heart said in unison.. "Your life will be shamefully boring."

How interesting.. for once, my brain AND my heart are at the same page. NAIS :)

Well, that said, I wonder.. when will the day - where everything would go totally unpredictable, and no longer the same old cycle of routines - ever come?

'Cause I'm dying to live. :/

Friday, October 15, 2010

My fingers is pretty sore..

On Saturday, my sister flew to UK. Surrey, to be exact. Like I said earlier, it's for a job. Which I'm far from knowing.. or wanting to know. And that same night, I bought The Complete Series of Sherlock Holmes Volume 2. YAY. I've been hunting for that book.. only that I didn't expect to find it at the airport, the least of my expectations a place I'd never thought of looking.. and then I prayed, for my own good, that I'll use my PLKN savings for something super important. Like paying the bills for my college entrance. Or some freak injury on the leg - a sprained ankle, which is almost second nature.

The next day, my mum and I went to Giant then I saw a guitar then she saw me seeing the guitar then she got the hint. Then I said I wanna buy it then (I don't remember THIS part) then I told her, "you pay for it now then I'll pay you back," then she said "fine" then we take the guitar and tested it then.. to the trolley it goes. Until she thought, might as well get something that's of quality at an actual music shop. We dropped the guitar at some random place, after which we went to buy some cooking stuff and later to IOI.. at Clavi, where I found the one I wanted. The guy who handled the purchase is real charming. Mum says he's good at marketing. I say he's kinda cute  ;P

And so the money is used to pay for the guitar. Yes, it is indeed a matter of little importance..

D is easy peasy. G? Sure I can do that. It's the C I've got trouble with. Damned fingers.. they bring 'fat fingers' a whole new meaning..

Have you heard Joy Electric's Decode? I did. I was shivering with.. (insert adjective here). It sounded like some gay (by that I meant sissy pussy, not the community, thanks) singing + nasty beat. I was like, "what the shit is this?" I was half-hoping for something that sounds like 3OH!3 stuffs or even Ministry of Sound annuals. How am I wrong.

Dude. You're sick. Get well soon.

I've got an important appointment on Sat.. can't tell what, might get jinxed (weird much?). Wish me luck anyway ;)

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Just another post.

Ok, word is that my sis MIGHT be going to UK this Friday for a job. Don't know what job, tho.. however it's gonna be quite a rush for her.. since she said - last week - she should leave in 2 weeks time. So technically, she shoulda start packing by next week, not this week. Rush much?

Hmm.. Mum's gonna be bummed. I can almost imagine her saying, "looks like there's only the two of now."
As much as I hate the way she said it - like, well.. a bad thing, when we could still find a way to overlook that - it's true.. and it sucks. I just hope she won't weep.. 'cause if she does, I won't be much help since I'm NOT the persuasive type.

But I'm sure she won't.. now that she has dozens of books to read. Then she'll read it again and again. Distraction, as I hoped, worked well when anything goes wrong. Not that I'm intending to say that escaping a problem is good.. just that it's nice to take a breather for a while and later face it when one thinks s/he is ready.

Speaking of books, I just bought Sherlock Holmes - The Complete Novels and Stories Volume 1. It's brilliant.. tho I had to a super thick dictionary with me. I have a thing for movies that are based on novels. Or rather.. novels that are made into movies. Like last time I watched Percy Jackson, I looked for the book and found it. Then I read it. Pretty nice.. could've been better had the author refrain from repeating the what, who, how and why of everything at the first couple of pages of the story.

Now I'm still looking for How to Train Your Dragon series. Might look Diary of A Wimpy Kid while I'm at it.

By the way, I found TwiLite.. where Bella Swan is, I think.. Stella Crow. Didn't buy it. But will look for it on the net. :)